Its been along time nadin ng huli kong naranasan ang ganitong pakiramdam,, pilit ko man iwasan ay nagpaparamdam parin sya paminsanminsan.Bawat araw may mga bago akong nakakasalumuha at nakikilalang mga tao, Its Like Everyday Life is like a new chapter that each chapter have different stories.Matagal ko nang giniveUP ang love dahil nadin sa huling beses na nasaktan ako at because of that pain kaya ako nagTransForm ng ganito, but thankfull padin ako dahil sa pain na iyon dahil masaya ako sa naging resulta nito "ANG MAGBAGO". Every pain have lessons and good results yun ang natutunan ko based on my exp.Nasaktan ako ng todo na halos wala ng bukas at ako na ang pinakaFAILURE na tao sa buong mundo, nasa EMOTIONAL PERIOD of my Life ako that time w/ matching Msic pa na talagang dinadala talaga ako sa
EMPTINESS OF MYLIFE!!! Todo luha talaga ako that moment na awang awa ako sa sarili ko "KUNG BAKIT BA AKO NAGKAKAKAGANUN" at kung bakiit ako naging ganito, its my choice naman maging iba ang Pagtingin sa buhay!!!. Being homosexual is VERY2x HARD,wala akong assurance kung ano ang patutunguhan ko in future, im not ugly and definitely im not a bad person I always try to be good, good looking naman ako at napakalinis pagdating sa personal hygiene.So bakit kaya ako niloloko ng ganito. That 8 months relationship w/ a straight guy is like 5 years para sa akin dahil yung mga happy moments namin mahirap kalimutan at wala pa akong naramdaman na ganun sa buong buhay ko,yung FEELING safe and Comfortable ka pag kasama you sya... kaya di ko sya makakalimutan nalang ng basta2x.
Okay back from the TOP while crying so hard that night,absorbing the pain i cant resist anymore like its the end of the day and my lifE(ANG DRAMA KOHH!!!HEHEHE!). I heard this two inspirational song that im playing on my mp3 player, the title of the song was "THEY CABT TAKE that AWAY" by MARIAH i will never forget that lyrics that gave me hope to stand up and face life "THEY CANT SAY ANYTHING THEY WANT TO SAY TRY TO BRING ME DOWN BUT I WONT FACE THE GROUND ETC.",,that lyrics make my tears to stop from falling down and anoother song that really make me smile and face the MIRROR was the song "BEAUTIFUL" by cristina aguillerera mas lalo akong nabuhayan ng loob para harapin ang bukas!!!!
(ITUTULOY)
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